Parenting during COVID-19…Don’t Be Hard on Yourself and Your Feelings are Valid.

I want you to know: mamas, dads, and everyone else reading this… I want you to know, that you’re doing a good job. I know you may think you’re not, but trust me, I am 99% sure that you are, and that you’re being hard on yourself.

If you’ve lost your sh*t, trust me, I’ve been there. It is OK… we are only human. Our kids will lose their shit too. Their schedules have been upended. They are stuck in tiny apartments with US. They want to eat junk food and play video games all day long (which, if you listen to my son talking to his third grade friends, he swears it is all he did). But, we have to pause and put ourselves in their shoes… we would probably be losing it too. At least as adults we can eat whatever we want, shower whenever we want, watch whatever we want. We are always telling our kids what to do… When I stop to think about it, It’s understandable that they lose it too.

It’s also understandable when we lose it, because DAMN it… how many times are we supposed to say GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH, PUT ON YOUR SOCKS, SET THE TABLE PLEASE… TURN OFF THE LIGHT WHEN YOU LEAVE YOUR ROOM (guys, I am DREADING THAT electricity bill!!!).

If I may, I want to share some things I’ve learned while I’ve been on quarantine for what feels like 2345423 days.

Parenting during COVID…

First, it’s OK to stay in your PJs all day. And it’s OK to feel like you have to put on makeup and cover your under eye circles and pretend you’re having a meeting if you’re not. YOU DO YOU BOO. Whatever makes you feel better. If you want to glam up DO THAT. If you wanna dress down, do that! Do whatever makes you feel a little bit better about this whole situation. 

It’s OK that dry shampoo is your BFF.
And it’s OK that Benefit concealer is your BFF.

It’s OK to eat breakfast for dinner and dinner for breakfast. Are there really food rules anymore? 

It’s OK to hide in the bathroom. Or, take a slightly longer shower, or pretend you’re pooping and lock the door so the kids don’t come in. 

It’s ok to find comfort in mundane things like washing dishes or doing laundry (both which I confess I have found comfort in).

It’s OK to get completely lost in a 500 piece jigsaw puzzle, and be more excited about it than your kid.

It’s OK to make your kids eat vegetables and you eat Cheetos for dinner (please tell me that it isn’t only me…)

It’s OK to be great one day and be totally sad the next. Rollercoaster of emotions over here.

It is OK to not watch the news… actually, please ration the news that you watch because it can’t be good for our mental health to watch 24/7 coverage.

It is OK to CRY.

It is OK to take a break from real life and get lost in painting with your kids.

It is OK to want to SCREAM. I thought about doing this a few days ago, but I thought that I’d scare my neighbors.

It is OK to CRY (saying it again because it needs repeating).

It’s OK to take time to do something that isn’t related to your kids and that is only for yourself. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Hi there it’s Diana. I hadn’t shared here but I actually spent the last two weeks being pretty sick. I’m 98% sure my daughter and I both have (had) #covid19. For me to started the evening of Monday the 9th, with a sore throat. My daughter had the worse dry cough she’s had in her life. She had a fever after a couple of days of coughing. Her fever was 100.0 and the Nurse said we should just stay home. Since we are not famous or rich there was no way for us to get tested. 🤷🏻‍♀️ For me it’s been up and down… today I feel like I finally am on the mend… I felt like that on Monday and the felt super sick the next day, so my husband took time off work so I could rest and sleep and he could be with the kids. I feel like I haven’t been able to process it— many of us are just in survival mode… “let me get better, let me make sure my kids so their work/are entertained/ survive, let me see if I can get some work done.” Does anyone else feel like they haven’t even had time to process this? I texted a friend the other day and said “so this is how it ends?” Mostly joking but with a tiny bit of worry. The unknown is scary. We don’t know how long this will last, how it will end… we don’t know what life is going to look like afterwards. We don’t even know how many people are sick… I don’t even know what I’m trying to say— everything is moving so fast and not fast enough… I was still processing Warren’s exit when this exploded. 😱 if you’re reading this and you’re scared and you don’t know how to articulate or process your feelings, that’s all valid. Maybe this is the way we are meant to live… without the rush of commuting, or 10 hour workdays or schedules. We are being forced to be present and now is the time to do all the things that we always said we don’t have time for. I played JUST DANCE with my kid today! (And lost which is another story)… we started a 500 piece puzzle! (That we haven’t finished yet) . I can’t remember when I spent hours on something with my older kid. And as much as this sucks, these are the times he’s going to remember. Our children are going to remember how we acted, how safe they felt with us, how loved they felt… cont. in comment

A post shared by Parenting and Politics (@parentingandpolitics) on Mar 19, 2020 at 9:26pm PDT

“These were the best of times and the worst of times… there’s always beauty in the chaos right? “

It’s OK to feel joy, even if for a moment. 

It’s OK to feel overwhelmed at remote learning, and curse the person who thought that expecting kids to be online for a whole school day would be a good idea. 

It’s OK to feel like you don’t know how to process your emotions, because, we have never been in a global pandemic before. 

It’s OK to feel like you need a mental break. 

It’s OK to want to bake. It’s OK to want to cook. (Follow @ChefKelvin on Instagram for inspiration, he’s a chef to the stars). I

t’s OK to want to order take out (also, please support your local restaurants! They definitely need our support!)  

It’s OK to want to seek professional help. 

It’s OK to get scared and question bringing kids into this world. 

It’s OK to want to laugh. Please, find something that makes you laugh. 

It’s OK to laugh when you cry. 

It’s OK to be angry and want things to CHANGE!

It’s OK to be mad at the broken systems we have. It’s OK to want to demand more from our elected officials. (Let’s DO IT!) 

It IS NOT OK to lose hope. Hope is our superpower. Remember that. 

Have you checked out my podcast? You can learn more about it here.